Real M.E.N.

Unusual title for an article, I know. But it has been every woman’s dream at at least once in her life. To live that unforgettable, romantic night with the man she loves. To feel like a princess or queen, to be treated as if she is the most loved and cherished being in a man’s life. A fantasy? Yes. Impossible? No. She can live the life of royalty if she’s worth it. As a man that has yet to reach his financial peak I’ve learned that fancy expensive gifts are appreciated, but thoughtful sentimental gifts/actions are even greater. If you love her, if you want to remind her that you love her, or you simply just want to get out of the dog house this will make her fall for you all over again.
First, plan. Sit down and think of every thing she’s ever told you she enjoys or might want to try/go. Planning must be done, as guys we hate it, but keep in mind this is her day. Begin with the breakfast in bed gesture, never gets old. The first planned event begins the day so make it a good one, personally I prefer to go the soothing route and schedule a nice massage, manicure, and pedicure. This will relax and beautify her simultaneously (If you’re really confident, schedule a hair appointment. However I recommend this event for a husband or advanced boyfriend). Second, shopping then lunch. You may ask why lunch, isn’t that too soon? Trust me, shopping will consume hours of time. Be mentally prepared for her to ask you countless opinions on endless articles of clothing. But say it with me: This is her day. Besides, she will be shopping for the perfect outfit to wear that evening. Remember not to tell her where the both of you will be going that night,keep her guessing. Anticipation is a huge strategy within your plan. Lunch? You have two options: Either choose a restaurant you have never been to or restaurant tied to a fond memory, preferably “First” memory. Order the same meal that you were served on that significant day, and though it may be difficult, try to seat in the exact same table/booth. Make her relive the moment, the convo must make her reflect and see how much your relationship has grown.
Now that the shopping is done and your bellies are full, choose something active to do. Fight the itis. Again, something new. Choose something you’ve never tried together. If she’s the intellectual/eclectic type choose an art gallery, maybe even check to see if an special festival/gathering may be held in town that weekend. Planning is important. If there isn’t much going on in town, pick up some paint and canvas notebooks to make your own masterpieces (there are some businesses that provide these services). For those who may not have wanted to do the restaurant event I previously mentioned, a romantic picnic in a beautiful park would work just as well. Cheaper, and food not as great as a restaurant, but women love the intimacy and rarity of it.
Next, you will have maybe 2-3 hours of time on your hands in between, this time frame I will leave up to you. Use it wisely. Use it to unveil your feelings and share your deepest thoughts …. Naaah, just use it wisely though.
Fast forward to the evening. The big event (Try to fit flowers and candles in at this time, set the mood). If you really want her to live out this Cinderella fantasy, dancing must be included. This means you must research a nice spot that has and encourages couples-dancing. No not a club, we don’t want to serenade her with Waka Flocka chants and gun cocking sounds. There is always a night club in a part of town that offers a live band with soulful calming tunes, find this place! She will be beautiful, tell her so repeatedly. She will be smiling, tell her it lights the room. Make her feel this is HER NIGHT. Enjoy the night with your woman, show her you cherish her love and commitment.
There are thousands of combinations to use to bring this fantasy to life, it’s all up to you and how well you know your woman. Every real, deserving woman should wear Cinderella’s stilettos at least once in her life, make it happen.


- Adjasont Thoughts

Questions that wreck my mind, unanswered questions that tug and tear at my heart. Watching a friend suffer is an awful feeling, witnessing a family member suffer is devastating.

What makes a young woman with her whole life ahead her settle? Settle for a man that is an ex-drug dealing, “rap career” dreaming, lying, felon but unfortunately the father of her child. A man that proposed to her only weeks after knowing of her pregnancy, because it felt like the “right” thing to do. A man that carries photographs of other women in his wallet but not yours. A man that sleeps during the day and goes to the “studio” at night, only to return home drunk and high. Why does she do it to herself? Why help pay his cell phone bills, car note, even give him gas money?
If these questions don’t boggle the mind, maybe the next few will: Why let a man that hasn’t provided for you or your child at all persuade you into a threesome with a 18 year old coworker? Why be in shock, heartbroken once hearing news of that same girl pregnant with his child? Why seek sympathy and comfort from family, then fund his birthday strip club party 4 days later?.. How blind is love?
Why listen in on his mother’s phone conversation with that 18 year old girl discussing future arrangements and shopping dates in the car you help pay for, build the nerve to finally leave… But then return to him a week later?
Is it low self-esteem? Is it youth? Is it allure of maybe one day having the traditional happy family? Is it the idea that he will change, that he will mature into the “ideal” role? Is it really Love? It can’t be… Right?


- Adjasont Thoughts